Things you don't hear anymore

Now that school is getting ready to begin, I've been thinking of things my mother used to tell me that I do/don't say to my kids. Here is a list I found in an email. Maybe you've seen it before, maybe not. Either way, they are funny.

Be sure to refill the ice trays, we're going to have company after while.

Watch for the postman, I want to get this letter to Aunt Mary in the mail today.

Quit slamming the screen door when you are on your way out!

Be sure and pull the windows down when you leave, it looks like a shower is coming up.

Don't forget to wind the clock before you go to bed.

Wash your feet before you go to bed, they are nasty from playing outside all day barefooted. (Heard frequently at our house, but not from barefoot, just sandals)

Why can't you remember to roll up your pant legs? Getting them caught in the bicycle chain so many times is tearing them up.

You have torn the knees out of that pair of pants so many times there is nothing left to put a patch on.

Don't you go outside with your good school clothes on!

Go comb your hair; it looks like the rats have nested in it all night. (I say this to my girls all the time)

Take that empty bottle to the store with you so you won't have to pay a deposit on another one.

Put a dish towel over the cake so the flies won't get on it.

Quit jumping on the floor! I have a cake in the oven and you are going to make it fall if you don't quit!

Let me know when the Fuller Brush man comes by, I need to get a few things from him

You boys stay close by, the car may not start and I will need you to help push it off.

There's a dollar in my purse, get 5 gallons of gas when you go to town. (I WISH!!)

Open the back door and see if we can get a breeze through here, it is getting hot.

You can walk to the store; it won't hurt you to get some exercise.

Don't sit too close to the TV. It is hard on your eyes.

If you pull that stunt again, I am going to wear you out!

Don't lose that button; I'll sew it back on after awhile.

Wash under your neck before you come to the table, you have beads of dirt and sweat all under there.

Get out from under the sewing machine; pumping it messes up the thread.

No! I don't have nine cents for you to go to the show. Do you think money grows on trees?

Eat those vegetables, they'll make you big and strong like your daddy.

That dog is NOT coming in this house! I don't care how cold it is out there, dogs just don't come in the house.

Sit still! I'm trying to get your hair cut straight and you keep moving and it is all botched up.

Hush your mouth! I don't want to hear words like that! I'll wash your mouth out with soap! (I have threatened this. But not for bad words...for spitting!)

It is time for your system to be cleaned out. I am going to give you a dose of castor oil tonight.

If you get a spanking in school and I find out about it, you'll get another one when you get home.

Quit crossing your eyes! They will get stuck that way!

Soak your foot in this pan of coal oil so that bad cut won't get infected.

When you take your driving test, don't forget to signal each turn. Left arm straight out the window for a left turn; left arm bent up at the elbow for a right turn; and straight down to the side of the door when you are going to stop.

It is: 'Yes Ma'am!' and 'No Ma'am!' to me, young man, and don't you forget it! (In the South this is still the norm)

So, what do you remember from "back in the day"?

Happy reminiscing!

-Apple